Dear Facebook friends: thanks so much for all of your heartfelt two-word birthday wishes on my wall. Especially those of you whom I’ve never met but who work with my ex-officemate’s brother-in-law. I’m truly blessed to have you in my life, even if I couldn’t pick some of you out of a police lineup (love those cartoon profile pictures!).
Wow, Penelope. Your baby has grown so much since you posted a video of her yesterday. She is just galloping past those milestones! I’ll be away from my desk for a few minutes and my Facebook iPhone app has been squidgy lately, so please text the next video to me. I can’t bear to go more than a couple of hours without an update. Please also use seven exclamation points and three lols in the text.